How to not be a hypocrite -->

I have been blessed to have had so many good things happen in my life lately. Just this past weekend I was in Hershey, Pennsylvania with my youth group to chaperone for them at youth convention. I know that during my last blog I was really tired and it probably didn't make too much sense, but basically a synopsis of it would be...it was awesome :). I haven't written since the first service so I thought I'd update everyone on how the others went as well. The Friday morning candle light communion service was pretty good; much better than past years. I can't really tell you what else I remember from that service because the evening service was so memorable.

Typically, A/G youth conventions leave the last night to be their "receive the Holy Spirit" night. All I have to say is that I don't remember ever hearing a call to receive the Holy Spirit, but He certainly was present. At the beginning of the speaker's message he announced that at any time during his message that anybody could feel free to come down to the altar as they saw fit. I knew off the bat that it was going to be a powerful night. However, I expected maybe only a handful of people to make their way to the altar, but I promise you by the time he actually made the altar call that there was no room because the altar was full. Starting about halfway through service until the end I saw countless couples and triples of people make their way to the altar, each group clearly showing emotion. At the point of the actual altar call the speaker called the people in the building to feel the pain of the people in their lives who needed Christ. He counted to three, and when he said three I experienced something I don't think I've ever experienced in my life. I heard a roar of weeping echo throughout the arena. The sadness alone was enough to make one cry. I remember following some of my kids up to the altar (well to the sound booth because there was too many people to actually make it there). I began to cry out for God to show me the pain that would drive me to doing what I was called to do, but amidst the people that we're clearly being touched by God, I felt like I wasn't. I helped minister to some of my kids after the service was over, and I believe God used me in it, but as far as my own life being touched I didn't feel like God had done anything. I walked out of the building disappointed because I had heard all these people weeping over their "ministries", and I wasn't feeling it. I was silent on the walk back to van. Everybody got into the van and waited for our driver; I walked around the empty parking lot asking God what I was doing wrong. We finally did leave, and as we drove away from the Giant Center...it hit me. I began seeing those in my life that I was to minister to. I felt their pain, immensely. I felt a burden. I remember telling God "I'll go...I'll go" but I remember feeling like he was saying back to me "Just trust me...just trust me"...

There was a famous 2nd century martyr by the name of Perpetua that I have been reading about. She was a 21 year old Christian that had her baby held in front of her and was told to deny Christ. She instead denied her child. I don't really have time to tell you what her story means to me, but she was killed by the Roman government for her belief in the Messiah, and her baby was orphaned.

What is the point of all this rambling? All I have time to say is that I really am starting to feel people's pain. I am really starting to understand what it means to be a real Christian. I'm learning how to not be a hypocrite. How? A denial of self; a taking up of a cross that has been put before you. Jesus took up his cross, and it benefited many others. I truly am starting to believe that our cross is the same thing. Our denial of self isn't just to benefit us; it's not just limited to the pleasing of God; but I truly believe that our cross is to be taken up so that many would come to know Christ and that God would be glorified.

I trust him, and as much as it scares me (and it does to death) I am learning how to die to myself so that others may have the pain of their lives satisfied by the power of the Gospel which is unto salvation.

So, don't be a hypocrite, deny yourself, take up your cross, feel other people's pain.
It's the hardest thing in the world to do.

A long time coming...

I'm chilling in the Sheraton Hotel in Harrisburg currently. It's 12:46 on Friday, March 21, and I just got through my first night of Youth Convention with Evolution Student Ministries. Needless to say, tonight was everything I expected and so much more. For the last couple of days I have really been praying that God would touch the teens in our youth group because I know it's hard for them to pursue God in youth group. I don't know why this is exactly, but it was rather encouraging to see the teens seeking God like they did. There's just something about being in an arena filled with 5000+ other teenagers seeking God. Tonight definitely took me back to my days when I was a teenager and was experiencing youth convention for the first time. I certainly am blessed to have had such awesome people pour into my life like they did...I wouldn't be where I am today if these people hadn't.

I also have observed how far I have come as a Christian and a leader since those days. This is my first time being back at convention in 2 years, and this time, instead of being a student I am a leader. Today I've already had to do some duties of a leader. I've had to use discernment in what to say to these teenagers. I've had to discipline people and punish them. Tonight at service two of my girls answered an altar call, and we ended up walking right up to the stage in front of 5000+ people. By the end of the time up front we were all crying and praising God. I had an opportunity to pray for them as they cried out to Him. God moved in such a powerful way tonight, and it wasn't just in the service (which I will admit was amazing), it was also in my own heart as I saw how far he has taken me. He's made it so very clear what he's done in my life, and I am thankful beyond measure for the plan he's manifested in my life, and what he's going to continue to do. I can't wait to see what the next 2 days hold for us.

He is faithful.

Scapegoat

Traditionally, we associate the word "scapegoat" with blaming somebody for something, regardless as to whether it was their fault. In Leviticus 16 of the Bible God points out his instructions as to how the Israelites were going to have their sins forgiven by God. The priest was to take two goats, one that would be killed and presented to the Lord as a sin offering, the other, the "scapegoat" was to be presented alive and sent out into the wilderness. Traditionally this is understood as the sins being "put on" to this animal and carried away never to be remembered by God again.

Fast forward.

In any school of Christian thought, one would understand the deity of Christ to be and not limited to anything less than God himself. In the understanding of the incarnation and the sacrifice of Christ on the cross, we can assume that Christ's sacrifice fulfilled all the requirements of the Law in the area of atonement.

This being said...

The last couple days for me have been very reflective in the area of Christ on the cross because I've been reading alot for my Theo 2 paper that's due this week. God actually put on flesh and died to once and for all atone his people. He took our sin and bore it on his shoulders, and when I think about that sacrifice, God saw the fact that we screwed up, and He stepped out and did something about it. He took on both the roles of the sacrificed goat and the scapegoat, and as God poured out his wrath on himself (which is profound in it's own context) one could assume that he was actually blaming himself in his righteous judgment. Now before we pull out the stones and cry "heresy", let me explain that I don't for one second believe it to be God's fault for our sin, but if we can correctly assume this, it would mean that God loved us enough; wanted a relationship with us enough that he'd be willing to step in and take that role in order to meet us right where we are. He shifted the blame from the creation to the creator (Himself) and punished sin on his own shoulders. To me that is profound...and I'm not going to write anymore tonight, but I do ask that, if you are reading this, take 5 minutes and reflect on how much God did for you.


...His love endures forever...