I have been reading Philippians this week as part of my daily devotions, and let me say that I have been having my socks blessed off by it. I'm am so encouraged by Paul's attitude towards life. At the end of the book he speaks about being content in all situations, and of course you probably know his famous line in Philippians 4:13 which says "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me". May it just be known that when he wrote that he was chilling in prison, tied to a pole, sitting in his own feces. Anyway, my focus hasn't been so much on his contentedness as it has been on something else that has been going on in my life. If you have read any of my other blogs about Perpetua or perhaps have had the opportunity to talk to me, you know I have been struggling lately with the idea of Godly priority and martyrdom. I have been struggling with the fact that I feel like I am persecuted in NO WAY WHATSOEVER, however sometimes I feel like I am ashamed of my Savior. For example, I have trouble sharing my faith with people. There are people from the first and second century who had to share their faith too, except when they did they were thrown into the Colosseum to be eaten by wild animals at the expense of Rome's entertainment. Yeah..they lived and shared without shame. This fact has, to say the least, discouraged me quite a bit. My desire is to be pleasing to Him; to have Him as my priority; to be truly living like he is my God and to fulfill his purposes for my life. I just want to throw out a scripture that I have been reflecting on all week that has changed the way I look at this desire:
12Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, 13for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.
Let me say that it has been incredibly motivating to know that my desire to do God's will isn't even my own desire being made by me. God is the author of my desire, and if I have that desire, then it proves that I'm right where God wants me. I know he has a plan for my life, and I want to be pleasing to him. His good purposes will be made known daily to me because he is putting the will and the strength in me to live according to the standard He's called me to live. On top of it, He's called me into ministry where He wants me to reach people with his life changing Gospel. I just want to say that it has been incredible and it makes it so much easier for my busy life because amidst everything that is before me and needs to get done in so little time, I have peace because He is working in me to do what He has planned for me. God truly has good things in mind for us and doesn't leave us abandoned to attain it!
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
How to not be a hypocrite -->
I have been blessed to have had so many good things happen in my life lately. Just this past weekend I was in Hershey, Pennsylvania with my youth group to chaperone for them at youth convention. I know that during my last blog I was really tired and it probably didn't make too much sense, but basically a synopsis of it would be...it was awesome :). I haven't written since the first service so I thought I'd update everyone on how the others went as well. The Friday morning candle light communion service was pretty good; much better than past years. I can't really tell you what else I remember from that service because the evening service was so memorable.
Typically, A/G youth conventions leave the last night to be their "receive the Holy Spirit" night. All I have to say is that I don't remember ever hearing a call to receive the Holy Spirit, but He certainly was present. At the beginning of the speaker's message he announced that at any time during his message that anybody could feel free to come down to the altar as they saw fit. I knew off the bat that it was going to be a powerful night. However, I expected maybe only a handful of people to make their way to the altar, but I promise you by the time he actually made the altar call that there was no room because the altar was full. Starting about halfway through service until the end I saw countless couples and triples of people make their way to the altar, each group clearly showing emotion. At the point of the actual altar call the speaker called the people in the building to feel the pain of the people in their lives who needed Christ. He counted to three, and when he said three I experienced something I don't think I've ever experienced in my life. I heard a roar of weeping echo throughout the arena. The sadness alone was enough to make one cry. I remember following some of my kids up to the altar (well to the sound booth because there was too many people to actually make it there). I began to cry out for God to show me the pain that would drive me to doing what I was called to do, but amidst the people that we're clearly being touched by God, I felt like I wasn't. I helped minister to some of my kids after the service was over, and I believe God used me in it, but as far as my own life being touched I didn't feel like God had done anything. I walked out of the building disappointed because I had heard all these people weeping over their "ministries", and I wasn't feeling it. I was silent on the walk back to van. Everybody got into the van and waited for our driver; I walked around the empty parking lot asking God what I was doing wrong. We finally did leave, and as we drove away from the Giant Center...it hit me. I began seeing those in my life that I was to minister to. I felt their pain, immensely. I felt a burden. I remember telling God "I'll go...I'll go" but I remember feeling like he was saying back to me "Just trust me...just trust me"...
There was a famous 2nd century martyr by the name of Perpetua that I have been reading about. She was a 21 year old Christian that had her baby held in front of her and was told to deny Christ. She instead denied her child. I don't really have time to tell you what her story means to me, but she was killed by the Roman government for her belief in the Messiah, and her baby was orphaned.
What is the point of all this rambling? All I have time to say is that I really am starting to feel people's pain. I am really starting to understand what it means to be a real Christian. I'm learning how to not be a hypocrite. How? A denial of self; a taking up of a cross that has been put before you. Jesus took up his cross, and it benefited many others. I truly am starting to believe that our cross is the same thing. Our denial of self isn't just to benefit us; it's not just limited to the pleasing of God; but I truly believe that our cross is to be taken up so that many would come to know Christ and that God would be glorified.
I trust him, and as much as it scares me (and it does to death) I am learning how to die to myself so that others may have the pain of their lives satisfied by the power of the Gospel which is unto salvation.
So, don't be a hypocrite, deny yourself, take up your cross, feel other people's pain.
It's the hardest thing in the world to do.
Typically, A/G youth conventions leave the last night to be their "receive the Holy Spirit" night. All I have to say is that I don't remember ever hearing a call to receive the Holy Spirit, but He certainly was present. At the beginning of the speaker's message he announced that at any time during his message that anybody could feel free to come down to the altar as they saw fit. I knew off the bat that it was going to be a powerful night. However, I expected maybe only a handful of people to make their way to the altar, but I promise you by the time he actually made the altar call that there was no room because the altar was full. Starting about halfway through service until the end I saw countless couples and triples of people make their way to the altar, each group clearly showing emotion. At the point of the actual altar call the speaker called the people in the building to feel the pain of the people in their lives who needed Christ. He counted to three, and when he said three I experienced something I don't think I've ever experienced in my life. I heard a roar of weeping echo throughout the arena. The sadness alone was enough to make one cry. I remember following some of my kids up to the altar (well to the sound booth because there was too many people to actually make it there). I began to cry out for God to show me the pain that would drive me to doing what I was called to do, but amidst the people that we're clearly being touched by God, I felt like I wasn't. I helped minister to some of my kids after the service was over, and I believe God used me in it, but as far as my own life being touched I didn't feel like God had done anything. I walked out of the building disappointed because I had heard all these people weeping over their "ministries", and I wasn't feeling it. I was silent on the walk back to van. Everybody got into the van and waited for our driver; I walked around the empty parking lot asking God what I was doing wrong. We finally did leave, and as we drove away from the Giant Center...it hit me. I began seeing those in my life that I was to minister to. I felt their pain, immensely. I felt a burden. I remember telling God "I'll go...I'll go" but I remember feeling like he was saying back to me "Just trust me...just trust me"...
There was a famous 2nd century martyr by the name of Perpetua that I have been reading about. She was a 21 year old Christian that had her baby held in front of her and was told to deny Christ. She instead denied her child. I don't really have time to tell you what her story means to me, but she was killed by the Roman government for her belief in the Messiah, and her baby was orphaned.
What is the point of all this rambling? All I have time to say is that I really am starting to feel people's pain. I am really starting to understand what it means to be a real Christian. I'm learning how to not be a hypocrite. How? A denial of self; a taking up of a cross that has been put before you. Jesus took up his cross, and it benefited many others. I truly am starting to believe that our cross is the same thing. Our denial of self isn't just to benefit us; it's not just limited to the pleasing of God; but I truly believe that our cross is to be taken up so that many would come to know Christ and that God would be glorified.
I trust him, and as much as it scares me (and it does to death) I am learning how to die to myself so that others may have the pain of their lives satisfied by the power of the Gospel which is unto salvation.
So, don't be a hypocrite, deny yourself, take up your cross, feel other people's pain.
It's the hardest thing in the world to do.
Friday, March 21, 2008
A long time coming...
I'm chilling in the Sheraton Hotel in Harrisburg currently. It's 12:46 on Friday, March 21, and I just got through my first night of Youth Convention with Evolution Student Ministries. Needless to say, tonight was everything I expected and so much more. For the last couple of days I have really been praying that God would touch the teens in our youth group because I know it's hard for them to pursue God in youth group. I don't know why this is exactly, but it was rather encouraging to see the teens seeking God like they did. There's just something about being in an arena filled with 5000+ other teenagers seeking God. Tonight definitely took me back to my days when I was a teenager and was experiencing youth convention for the first time. I certainly am blessed to have had such awesome people pour into my life like they did...I wouldn't be where I am today if these people hadn't.
I also have observed how far I have come as a Christian and a leader since those days. This is my first time being back at convention in 2 years, and this time, instead of being a student I am a leader. Today I've already had to do some duties of a leader. I've had to use discernment in what to say to these teenagers. I've had to discipline people and punish them. Tonight at service two of my girls answered an altar call, and we ended up walking right up to the stage in front of 5000+ people. By the end of the time up front we were all crying and praising God. I had an opportunity to pray for them as they cried out to Him. God moved in such a powerful way tonight, and it wasn't just in the service (which I will admit was amazing), it was also in my own heart as I saw how far he has taken me. He's made it so very clear what he's done in my life, and I am thankful beyond measure for the plan he's manifested in my life, and what he's going to continue to do. I can't wait to see what the next 2 days hold for us.
He is faithful.
I also have observed how far I have come as a Christian and a leader since those days. This is my first time being back at convention in 2 years, and this time, instead of being a student I am a leader. Today I've already had to do some duties of a leader. I've had to use discernment in what to say to these teenagers. I've had to discipline people and punish them. Tonight at service two of my girls answered an altar call, and we ended up walking right up to the stage in front of 5000+ people. By the end of the time up front we were all crying and praising God. I had an opportunity to pray for them as they cried out to Him. God moved in such a powerful way tonight, and it wasn't just in the service (which I will admit was amazing), it was also in my own heart as I saw how far he has taken me. He's made it so very clear what he's done in my life, and I am thankful beyond measure for the plan he's manifested in my life, and what he's going to continue to do. I can't wait to see what the next 2 days hold for us.
He is faithful.
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About Me
- Michael Steinsdoerfer
- Phoenixville, Pennsylvania, United States
- I graduated from Valley Forge Christian College in December of 2009. I hope to pastor/teach in the near future and continue my education by pursuing an Masters of Divinity from a prestigious graduate school or seminary. I enjoy music, sports (especially the Pittsburgh Penguins) and spending time with friends and family. Please feel free to e-mail me at masteinsdoerfer@gmail.com or follow me on Twitter @MikeSteiny